That is a rather uninformative and prosaic title for what was really a very interesting and varied ride.

We could have hijacked the soccer commentator’s cliché and called it “A Ride of Two Halves” because that is exactly what it was: a flat and fairly fast ride out through Hurst, Swallowfield and Arborfield on what is essentially the route of the old “Reliability Ride” before swinging Northwest towards Theale and hammering down the main road to Pangbourne.

Crossing the Thames  from Berkshire into Oxfordshire via the Whitchurch toll bridge marked a dramatic change in pace as we climbed up the double ramps of Path Hill out of the valley to Goring Heath and Gallowstree Common. Seemingly only an 8-9% incline on Strava and Ride with GPS, the hill actually maxes out at 13%. From the top it was a just a matter of plunging down Playhatch (better named “Suicide Drive” when the bends are rendered greasy by a light drizzle) then through the ever-picturesque village of Sonning before the traditional race back from Twyford and Rustage to the Maidenhead town sign.

Costa coffee in Pangbourne, while a convenient halfway point and both a reliable and welcome refuge from the light rain, was hardly the focal point of the ride. If there is one star segment to excite the imagination and surprise newcomers to this route, it is Hose Lane. At a mere 611 metres, it consists of 3 short switchbacks on a 10% decline between Burghfield Village and Theale. The Stelvio pass or the descent of Tourmalet it is not, but…as you swing right then left then right again and if you have a very vivid imagination, you’re transported for a few brief moments into a world inhabited by Jacques Anquetil, Eddy Merckx, Bernard Hinault and Miguel Indurain, for Hose Lane is like a miniature alpine descent (and it really is miniature!) You half expect to be overtaken at any moment by a dinky toy model of a Škoda command car or to wake up and find yourself in a new TDF addition to Beaconsfield Model Village but...it is undeniably great fun. So much so that Andew’s group did it twice - once going up and once coming down!

This morning’s ride started out as a nominally “Green” ride but morphed to Blue speed with Hewan and Stan pulling strongly at the front. Sadly we lost Allain and young Sebastien before Twyford as Sebastien had had a CoVID jab only yesterday and was still feeling below par. Because the group totalled 13 riders, Andrew Payne split off with five others into a separate group but we all arrived back in Maidenhead together.

A sign that’s hardly likely to boost the tourist trade

Hose Lane switchbacks - Tour de France in miniature

Costa at Pangbourne - welcome respite from the rain

Author: Mark Reynolds